This is a good time to complete tasks you started before Mercury Retrograde that you may not have finished. This is a good time to do some New Year’s cleaning in your home to help the energy in your home.
Also: Full Wolf Moon Rituals to honor the wolf inside you
A recent passing of one of Gavin’s dear friends has given me time to pause for reflection. This person was a true friend to Gavin, and to be honest, Gavin and Yvonne had very few true friends. I’ve sat on the sidelines (as the unwelcome and burdensome child) as an observer for most of my life, even as an adult sitting in my parents’ shadows. That may read as bitter, but it helped me learn so much that people may not have intentionally taught. In my 50’s, I started relearning what friendship might actually mean since I had seen so many appalling examples of friendship. This is a swamp for me, and for many others, who have had shallow friendships or friendships in name only. As we become more obsessed with tiny screens, our human interactions are decreasing, and this is a challenge to navigate, especially since many of us aren’t really good at being good friends to begin with. I set out a few years ago to relearn how to friend.
I’m being the change I want to see in the world. I have also struggled professionally in working for other people. The influence Gavin and Yvonne wielded ran deep and they were so adamant in working for your self. They recklessly advised everyone to go into business for one’s self even as small businesses failed at a rate of 50% within 5 year in the US and the laws and regulations became more and more tricky to navigate, still they advised working for yourself. I work for others, which brings its own labyrinth to navigate. I’m learning, after nearly 15 years, how to be a better employee. I’m also learning how to be a better friend.
And, still change is needed: be the change you wish to see in the world. In my professional environment, I wanted certain things and to build community. I have done so. I have participated in one movement in teaching in WV and am building another wave of community in another aspect of teaching in WV. I see it happening and am grateful that others are open to my ideas. With the passing of my dad’s friend, I thought long and hard about pagan “community.” If you ever scratched the surface of any one of my family members, you will know that we do not believe such a thing exists. From hard lessons learned from Loy and Louise Stone to modern day “friends” who mock us when our backs are turned, community is not what the modern Pagan movement is doing, period. For those of you that feel safe and welcomed at festival or at other gatherings, thank your deity construct that you have found those decent humans.
Now that I have built community (and continue on that trajectory in WV), I am going to change my attitude with Paganism. This change starts with me, and with you, the reader. Be the change you wish to see. What does your Pagan community look like? It starts with you and builds with you. Be kind, be gracious, be firm – when gossip or negativity happens to, or around, you, be firm that that is not welcome in your pagan community. People will hurt you, and as you grow in your community, and your faith, you will become more of a target, build anyway. We can’t have community if we do not create it.
Winter time in the Northern Hemisphere is a good time to reflect, so create a plan if you are up north with me. Who are likely candidates that can help you build community? Who are unlikely candidates to support your changing, growing persona? Invest your energy appropriately. Look for guidance to support your community growth. And embrace your fears as opportunities for growth. I want to honor my father’s friend’s passing and he would be grateful if I took these small steps to further his vision. Who can you honor with your growth?